A sharp, unapologetic, hilarious book about power, confidence, and getting what you want—not through self-help platitudes, but by mastering the art of being the most formidable woman in the room.

Maybe you’re a nice girl. Or maybe—more likely—you picked up this book because you’re not interested in being nice at all. This is not about gratitude journals, finding inner peace, or giving back to the universe. This is about ruling your world, commanding attention, and coming out on top in any situation involving men, money, friends, enemies, or ambition.

So how does a betch make that happen? By following a few brutally honest rules, including: don’t be easy, don’t be poor, and don’t be ugly. These aren’t gentle suggestions—they’re survival tactics for navigating life with confidence, leverage, and zero apologies.

Blunt, hilarious, and deliberately outrageous, this book delivers laugh-out-loud advice, biting observations, and fearless commentary on success, beauty, power, and modern womanhood. It’s not self-help—it’s how to deal with your problems when you have no problems. You’re welcome.